welcome to the working week

... a sinking ship.
last night the management at a particular trade school (which we'll call Mapital Schmidty Schmarrers) rounded up the teachers in for an 'emergency' meeting.

behind the desk, sat a large man fresh from the mean streets of the Bronx. 'people, we've got a loss in student enrollment. we're bleeding money and we need to fix it,' he slurred. i grew up with neighbors like this. on weekends, they walked around the malls with undersized polo shirts stretched over their over sized mid-sections. it was odd seeing one of them with a suit of questionable quality hanging off it. the mild austin winter was causing him to break into a sweat.

or was it the message of doom?

here is a list of problems suspected of causing the steady stream of exiting students.

1. teachers are too strict
2. teachers need to give more homework
3. classes need to be longer
4. students should be able to leave whenever
5. classes are too stale

here is a list of solutions

1. coffee for the spanish speakers
2. tea for the vietnamese population (b/c 'asians drink tea' -according to the sweating Bronx suit)
3. trips to the capital
4. plants in the classroom